ARE YOU FREAKING KIDDING ME ???

On Monday night I satrted taking my new Birth Control, the "mini-pill " , it is the only Birth Control you can take other than having an IUD while nursing. Anywhoo, i have started taking it to hopefully take control and wait a few years before having another baby. Want to hear the great news....
I'm having an ALLERGIC REACTION to it. Can you believe it, we are trying to be responsible adults ( there are a TON of people who have told us that they think we aren't being responsible ...l ike it's any of their business in the first place!!!) we do want 2 more kids but we definately want a break and my body NEEDS a break. But come on an allergic reaction ,now what am I suppose to do?
ALL of our babies were conceived while I was on birth control, so what's the deal . And yes we were using it correctly, it worked just fine for almost 2 years. Everybody tells us to use "other " methods as well, but obviously those don't work because we were using them as well.

So why not get an IUD? Because insurance doesn't pay for it. We are going to start taking up a collection . HE! HE! HE! Now what are we suppose to do, don't answer that.

AAAAAAAHHHHHHH !!!!!!!!

This is totally killing me. Sorry if this is a little to personal for people but I really needed to get this off my chest and I'm so frusturated. This isn't something people should be worrying about with 4 week old twins and 2 others under 3 at home!

This is just too much to deal with. This really Sucks!

I'm waiting for the Dr. to call me back and I'm dieing waiting, I'm SOOOO itchy and have welts ALL over my body. I wish the Dr. would call. This is totally rediculous.

I'll keep you posted.

I guess that's just my luck!

Not So Good News

Last week we got the not so good news that my Grandpa was diagnosed with Multiple Mylenoma ( cancer of the Bones). This is a very serious type of cancer it's almost untreatable. The Doctor wants to start radiation and Chemo. But as he is 86 this December, we are hoping that he doesn't do the treatments. That may sound bad, but having radiation and chemo will more likely make him very sick and (since there is no other way to say this ) they will probably kill him. He isn't in any pain or having any side effects, he is better off. this has been such hard news to take in, but at the same time it really explaines a lot of his past health problems. He has really bad back problems and had surgery putting 2 rods in along side his spine (quite a few years ago ) as well as bad knee problems.
As you can imagine it has been a very stressful and emotional time for my family. Expecially for me, my Grandpa is the only one I know. My Dads parents died when he was 13 and 15. So my grandpa has been double special to me. It's been hard for everybody in my family of course. We aren't even sure exactly how severe of stage it is, but I'm sure the news will not be very exciting. The worst part of everything is that my mom went down to Price last Wednesday through Saturday. That was the first time my mom went to Price without me since the day she drove down to pick me up from school in May 2002. Crazy Huh!!! The hard part of that was that was that I wasn't able to visit and support my grandparents. Mike and I are going to be planning a trip down soon, so grandma and grandpa can meat Abbey and Rusty.
This has been a very hard 2 weeks for me. My emotions are a mess, I am crying a lot more than I ever did with Max and Michaella . I think the reason for that is they were sleeping in there own rooms and through the night by this time and I'm not expecting Abbey or Rusty to do that anytime soon, because they are so small still. And the news with my grandparents is hard as well. I am just so very grateful for the blessings of the gospel and knowing that we are going to see grandpa in the eternities eases the pain, but it's still hard to remember that there is a season and a time for everything.

On a lighter note,
Max is doing a very good job at school. He loves it and doing a better job getting on the bus.
Michaella is really loving him being gone, she loves having mommy almost completely to herself.
Abbey and Rusty are doing well, they are sleeping in 4 hour blocks through the night- very good news for mommy and daddy. Except Abbey grunts like crazy and Rusty Squeks just as bad. We love it during the day, it's totally hillarious to hear them "talking" to each other. But at night oh my gosh it's so loud and I'm ready to have them sleep in there own room. PROBLEM with that though. They are going to be sharing a room with Michaella, but i don't want them keeping her awake. Hmmmm we'll have to figure this one out. We'll just have to wait until they are a bit bigger to go in there room.

Here's a peice of news ...... I think I'm getting sick. UGH I can't afford to get a cold or the flu. I have a sore throat and lets hope it stays that way. Well that's all that is new for us.
Oh by the way Mike went back to work.

Max's first Day At School !!!

Can you believe it Max is already going to school my baby well... ok so he's my almost 3 year old, potty trained and oldest of 4 baby, is going to preschool. His first day was Sept. 11, he took the bus all by himself today. How in the world did he get old enough to go to preschool and take the bus. :( mommies sad !!!

Max didn't want to look at the camera and smile.

He was acting shy for one of the first times in his life !!!

What a time to be shy.

Not to sure about this whole on the bus alone thing.

Max and his cute bus driver, getting buckled in.

Wanting Mommy to sit and come with him.

If you look very close in the second window you can see

Max's eyes and forehead.

He's too little to get in the bus and go to school,

He's only baby !!!

Nana and Michaella waiting on the Big Rock for Max

to come home.

The day Max went to school Mike ansd I took him to the bus stop ( I cried all the way there trying not to let Max see ) I put him on the bottom step of the bus stepped back to take a picture, the second the picture took he jumped off and ran to me saying he didn't want to go alone. I was devastated. I really want him to like going on the bus ( I don't need to worry about school, He LOVES going to school !!! ) I think the airbrakes scare him. I got on the bus with him sat him down on the seat while his bus driver buckled him in and Max kept saying Mommy sit, mommy sit. He wanted me to come with him because he was scared. I was crying the WHOLE time trying to hide behind the camera - not to well I might add. Then I Leaned over kissed him, told him I loved him and we would be here to pick him up after school turned around got off the bus and cried even harder waving and saying goodbye. He was SO tiny, he could barely see out the window. Oh man I'm crying as I'm writting this. I was and am such a mess. I blame it all in the post-partum hormones and emotions - All though we all know that it wasn't completely the hormones. As the bus drove away I died. When we got home I tried to get life back together and do something, the phone rang. It was Max's bus driver calling to tell me he was ok, she had dropped him off at school. She said he didn't cry at all, and when he saw the school he got a HUGE smile and he was just fine. When we picked him up after school, my Mom had come with us. When the bus pulled up and the doors opened I heard Max yell at the top of his lungs NANA !!! He jumped off the bu sran passed me and ran straight to my mom. I don't mind that much because I love my mom so I didn't mind, but he didn't even care that I was there. I was just happy he was happy.

Just a quick note - I cried the WHOLE time Max was gone, what a dork I am!!!

WELCOME HOME MAX !!!

Just look at that smile.

And here he comes

What a big boy he is !!!

Max, Michaella and Nana walking ack to the house

after getting Max from his first day at school.

The rest of life is going well. Max has continued to go to school and doesn't have a problem he does still get a bit nervous to get on the bus but he does well. Michaella is LOVING Max going to school because she gets more time with Mommy and Daddy.

The twins are doing well. We went to the Dr.'s yesterday:

Abbey weighs 6 lb. 6.5 oz. YEAH !!!! and is doing wonderful and we have medicine for her acid reflux.

Rusty weighs 5 lb. 2 oz. YEAH again !!! The Doctor was so pleased with their weight. The best news is the breastfeeding is enough and for now we don't need to suppliment with formula. We are very excited.

They both are getting closer to sleeping in there own room and through the night. The sleep in our bed against the wall on special pillows with a body pillow between the babies and myself.

I'll take a picture tonight and post it tomorrow so you can see.

They are only waking once a night to eat. They usually eat around 9 or 9:30 p.m. then they wake between 2-4:30 to eat and then between 7-9am. Overall I think they are doing very well.

Mike went back to work 2 days this week. Both days my mom was here with me - I would have died with out her here!!! The first day i was a mess the second i did better and ok I think.

He goes back 3-4 days this comming week and I'll be on my own for 1 of those days - so maybe the older kids will get to have another play date with our neighboor. I love her by the way Jennifer has saved my life so much lately!!!

Sorry, It has been a while since I've posted, but life is really starting to come togehter now and hopefully I will be able to post more often now.

It's about time

Ok, First I'm sorry to everybody about the wait for the update, but as I hope you will all understand life has been beyond crazy.

The story all started on Aug. 25 Monday. I went to the Dr. to have a Non-stress test done. Everything turned out just fine as we assumed it would be. I was starting to get very anxious, I really really wanted these babies here I was SO uncomfortable. Wednesday came and my mom and I went to Costco to see if the luck would continue.
Costco Luck
For those of you who don't know I am now totally convinced Costco was put on this earth to help me go into labor! I went to costco the day before I delivered Max and Michaella and now the twins. It works I promise

So walking around costco was killing me - it was so hard, but I liked it. Then we came home and I layed down in bed and the contractions started YEAH !!!
10 minutes then 7 minutes then 5 minutes then 3 minutes and stayed at that for 1 hour. At this point I was freeking out. I called Mike and told him to wait at work because he might just go to the hospital instead of coming all the way home first. As we walked to the car to go to the hospital ...... THEY STOPPED !!! Are you freaking kidding me !
I was beyond Livid, I couldn't even think straight. So Mike came home, I took a shower to try to calm down.
We asked my mom to stay over and Mike and I went walking determined to get these babies here sooner. By this time it was about 7:30pm. Mike and I drove to LDS Hospital and we started walking around. When in Labor with 1 baby they say to go to the hospital when contractions are 5 minutes apart for at least 1 hour, with twins they said 7 minutes apart for 1 hour. So we walked around the hospital for 1 hour and the contractions had started but weren't regular. We decided to give it one more hour until 9:30 and as soon as we started walking again they came every 7 minutes for 1 hour and up we went to the 4th floor of LDS. They put us in a room, hooked me up to the monitors ( they had to do an ultrasound to find the heartbeats ) checked me and said I was dilated to a 2 and 65-70% effaced. Called the Dr. and told me she wanted to do a labor check ( come back in 1 hour to see if I was truely in labor ) The nurse came back at 10:45 checked me again and I was a 3 and 85% effaced. Left to call the Dr. again and... we waited again, praying they wouldn't send us home. At 11 our nurse came back in with an arm load of stuff. She said " I'm going to take your labs, set up the OR and we'll have these babies out in less than an hour"
AAAAHHHHHH

The moment we had been waiting and trying for was finally here and ...... I am nervous - what why am I nervous??? When doing the C-section the nurse said both heads were down, I was kind of excited to be honest, i wanted to deliver naturally ( but definately with an epidural ) but at the same time I really didn't want to deliver one naturally and then have an emergency C-section due to the baby flipping. But I also had had crazy poking up in my right side on top of my ribs and was curious to what it was, so i asked if we could see. And it was a head Rusty's head to be exact the 2 heads they had seen lower down were Abbey's 1 head. So it was an automatic C-section. Then at 11:30 Dr. Holms ( Dr. Langeland was not on call that day) walked into our room asked a bunch of questions and said they'd be born by midnight. Well it happened to be Aug. 27 and if you remember I thought it would be great if they were born on 08/28/08, so I asked if we could wait until 12:00 so they would have the B-day i liked. She said that wasn't a problem at all and they'd just take things a little slower. Mike then out on his "Bunny suit" as the nurse called it, and off we went to the OR. We walked into the OR and everybody minus the 2 Dr.'s that would be doing the surgery were waiting for me. They asked me to "HOP" up onto the table. Yeah like I could hop up there. I couldn't even climb up there even if I wasn't pregnant. It was a very narrow table inverted towards the head. I asked for a stool and everybody kind of chuckled. I got my spinal block and we were on our way. Man I was so emotional I cried the WHOLE time I was nervous and just wanted healthy babies.
First came Abbey at 12:33 then Rusty at 12:34! and off they both went to be assessed and wipped off. Abbey needed to go to the Special Care Nursery ( SCN ) to have a little help breathing and I wasn't able to see her until 2:30 and at that time I just sat there holding her trying my hardest not to cry. Rusty how ever was able to come to with us Mike "drove" his bassenet to my room when we went.

While I was holding Abbey for the first time Mike took and bathed Rusty. While I was holding Abbey they took her off the Oxygen and turned down the flow of oxygen from a medium to slow flow. That just means she was able to breath easier and better. I was very relieved to hear that and felt very good to know that I was the reason she was doing better. I held her sitting in the wheelchair sleeping and holding her for about an hour then Mike came back we took pictures of the babies together and then I needed to go lay down. As I was putting Abbey down she pursed her little lips and started to cry. And of course I started to bawl as am now, andI held Rusty and cried all the way back to my room. Because of the construction they are doing there the SCN was on the opposite side of the floor as my room. Once she was able to nurse i walked the from my room to the SCN every 3 hours to feed her come back feed Rusty sleep for about 45 minutes then wake up walk to feed Abbey and come back and start all over again. I was able to feed Abbey Thursday ( 28th) evening and she was DC'd to my room on the morning of the 29th.

Now we are home life is crazy the babies are to little to sleep in there own room so they are still sleeping in our bed on special pillows against the wall and me. They are eating and sleeping well, but we are still not getting very much sleep, they are eating one right after another every three hours. I will try to keep up better on the blogging. But please understand I am a walking Zombee and trying to take care of 4.

Max and michaella are doing very well with the adjustment, they love to hug, kiss and hold the babies. We are so very blessed and very grateful to those who have helped us and continue to help us.

We are so grateful to our Heavenly Father who has blessed us with 4 very healthy and happy good little children, and we know that he will help us to keep sane and figure life out sometime.